October 2009
Stranger: im a dirty girl
You: take a bath.
You have disconnected.
i don't think that broke the ice.
Stranger: hi
You: avada kedavra.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
ahahahahaha. this is so fun for me :D
Stranger: boobs?
You: beard.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
lawl.
You: stranger danger?
Stranger: Danger stranger?
Stranger: Ask me anything
You: alright. what is your stand on unicorns? threat or not?
Stranger: Do to socioeconimic patterns I find it both ethical and economical to commit genocide on all niggers
Stranger: Yeah but unicorns scare the shit out of me
September 2009
wtf, jake.
mona: hahaha. i love talking to strangers.
jake: thats y ur goin to get raped with a metal pole
mona: ah, well at least i know how it's gonna go down.
jake: haha then u can protect urself with a titanium lady condom!
whoever you are, you made my night.
Stranger: I am a time traveler.
Stranger: I came from the future.
You: 101110011.
Stranger: OH NO, IT'S ALREADY BEGUN.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
http://omegle.com/ →
Defy everything your parents taught you. The advertisement for this, I kid you not is “TALK TO STRANGERS!” well that’s just awesome. make a partner site with free candy please.
hahahaa
fuckyeahvoldemort:
txtsfrmlstnght:
(720): its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don’t talk about it
mliaverage:
Today I got an angry phone call from my parents. My 6 year old sister had been sent to the Principal for refusing to draw her favorite animal. They said it was my bad influence. I asked her why she wouldn’t draw it. She said she had, it was an invisible frog. My work here is done. MLIA
mliaverage:
Today I saw a kid on one of those leash backpack things parents have. He was barking and his mom tried to make him stop. Way to go, kid. MLIA
On a large enough time line, the survival rate...
(via fuckyeahfightclub)
mliaverage:
Today was Harry Potter day at my school, so naturally, I dressed up. I was walking up the stairs to my class on the 3rd floor until I saw a sign that said: “The third floor corridor is off limits to anyone who does not wish to die a painful death.” It was signed by Albus Dumbledore. No one took that staircase. MLIA.
Listen
Colors of the Wind - Pocahontas
fuckyeahdisneysongs:
Why Should I Worry - Oliver...
Reserve a spot for a frenemy in HELL. →
Just when I thought it couldn’t get better…something comes along and says “no, Mona…it can.”
Reserve your spot in Heaven NOW! Limited Time... →
I wish I was kidding.
2012
yeah? we’re gonna have a problem here.
i’ve got to know. i’ve GOT TO KNOW. because i’ve got some pretty serious things to accomplish.
if it’s ending, i’m not going to college. i’m going to scotland.
OHAI NESSIE. COMIN FOR YEH.
monsterquest….please adopt me.
listening to owl city
is equivalent to eating rainbows.
Who is your hero?
“If there is no God…then WHO is Jesus’s dad?”
– Michael Scott, The Office.
“bears. beets. battlestar galactica.”
– Jim Halpert, while impersonating Dwight Schrute (via bethechange)
i just want everyone to know
that a good, hot, soft pretzel with cheese is my favoritest thing. because they are the best thing. not debatable.
“but on pretzel day…well i like pretzel day.” -stanley hudson
mliaverage:
Today, my university’s email went down for a few hours. When I logged back in, I had received an email from the school, letting me know the email was down. I am still confused about how this is helpful. MLIA
it's the 2000's.. you might want to try a pear.
mliaverage:
Today, I had to go to the doctor’s office where I was diagnosed with swine flu. I eat an apple every day. Obviously, times are changing. MLIA
your life is average.
mliaverage:
Today, we got back our zoology tests so we could see our grades. One of the questions asked how we were supposed to tell the difference between a living animal and a dead animal. I couldn’t remember the answer so I wrote “Poke it.” Full credit was awarded. MLIA
Number 4 Privet Drive, cupboard under the stairs.
01. If you went to Hogwarts, which house would you be sorted in?
IB. jk. Gryffindor/ Slytherin
02. Have you ever been to a Harry Potter midnight release? only every single one.
03. What did you think of Deathly Hallows?
I understand why it must be this way. Hated the epilogue, everything else was good though.
04. How many times have you reread the books? over 15. no joke. 6th only 3 times...
IB men
kbeasley:
are creeps. Likeable, hilarious creeps.
“Stupidity has a knack for getting its way.”
– The Plague
“I’m sorry I yelled at you..I’m just so used to working with kids.”
– Jim Carrey
Do you love clubbing old-timey pedestrians? I know... →
follow me.
this doesn’t have to be us.
“If I were invited to a dinner party with my characters, I wouldn’t show...”
– Dr. Seuss
I am applying to college,
and I am terrified.
“i’ll wear blue, bitch!”
– jake heller, in debate of wearing black/yellow to the harry potter party. 