Just read the abridged script for ‘No Friends With Strings Attached Benefits.’ I have missed this website.
Saw a guy planking in the street. I’ve never wanted someone to get hit by a car so badly.
It’s like being under the imperius curse…there’s this voice in your brain-and it’s not yours. It tells you to jump from higher places, take your turns too fast. And it’s not easy, but a noble part of your brain..or maybe your heart..says, “no.” But not everyone can say no, I guess. Some people have scared hearts. Not scared to stand up to the voice, but...
‘Dog Fakes Own Death.’ #realAmericanheadline
‘You bet your ass, flapjack.’ #FWB #newlifemotto
Ok, Nick Carter needs to be on a leash. #favorite
I am one traffic jam away from devoting my life to mass murder. Just so there’d be less people to worry about. #drastictimes#drasticmeasures
I love that this guy is having a phone date over his bluetooth. I get to hear all the awkward LOUD AND CLEAR.
Dear Mothman, I don’t know if you have a twitter or not…but I just want you to know that I believe in you. Love, Mona. PS- don’t visit me.
My uterus is now named Judas. And not in the lady gaga way. In the starting the period while in the middle of the woods way. #WHY
Camping for the first time. If I stop tweeting, start worrying.
i hate twilight
10knotes: orgyinthetardis: Submitted by thekaycho Follow 10Knotes, the 10,000 notes blog.
What ever happened to the ‘Dude! You’re getting a Dell!’ guy?
On saturday? At nine
Clue 2.0- where you actually get to kill someone with a lead pipe. And if someone figures out it was you-you pull out the revolver .#winning
I’m Harry. Harry Potter.